Riddle me this:
What job is a truly unique experience yet utterly commonplace? So entertaining the workers never stop talking about it, yet so difficult to perfect it supports a huge How-To book industry? In fact, the best known book on the subject has sold 50 million copies worldwide, second only to the Bible.
Befuddled, Bewildered? Scratching your noggin?
For the answer, please welcome my next delightful guest, Hazel Larkin!
Kristi: Hello Hazel, please tell us what you do?
Hazel: That is such an interesting question. The title of which I am most proud is that of Mum, as it took me ten years (and two husbands!) and a lot of other things, before I finally held my first baby in my arms.
Kristi: How long have you held this position?
Hazel: In reality, seven and a half years. In my heart, I’ve wanted this since I was about 3.
Kristi: That’s an awfully long time to hold a baby. (ba-dum-bum *cymbal crash*)
Kristi: Sorry. What do you like most about being a Mum?
Hazel: I like being the boss. I am the sheriff and there is no deputy! I love being with my children most of their waking hours. I love hearing what they say – especially when they don’t realise I can hear/am listening.
Kristi: Other than the obvious, what characteristics do you feel make you particularly good at being a Mum?
Hazel: I’m a bit mad. I also have a degree in psychology…….but I’m not entirely sure that helps on the job!!
Kristi: A mad psychologist. I see what you mean.
Hazel: I also knit; which means I have a great – and productive – way to de-stress.
Hazel: Do I have to?
Kristi: What other positions have you held?
Hazel: I was a freelance writer in Singapore. I wrote for TV, theatre and a variety of publications.
Hazel: Being a writer certainly made it easier to be a parent. I worked from home so could work around my children, to a large extent. Often, I brought my children to work with me. I had a meeting with a client in Malaysia three days after Kashmira – my youngest – was born.
Kristi: That’s a lovely name.
Hazel: Thank you. She has also been breastfed around three separate boardrooms.
Kristi: They must be the luckiest Board of Directors in the world!
Hazel: A Mum’s gotta do what a Mum’s gotta do.
Kristi: Damn straight! How did you end up where you are, as a happy mother of two?
Hazel: I ended up where I am by believing it would happen. Even when my ex-husband refused to have sex with me (do you know anyone else whose husband would not even try to consummate the marriage for a fortnight after the event??!)
Kristi: I’ve never asked.
Hazel: Even when infertility treatment failed… When my ex-husband refused to consider adoption… When the doctors told me I’d never have children… When my astrologer told me I would never have children. I put my efforts into working out how I would mother, while I was waiting to become a mother.
Kristi: The astrologer must’ve been the hardest blow. But You Did It!! Two lovely children and a very satisfied Board of Directors — Congratulations!
Hazel: It was worth it.
Kristi: Are there any other occupations in your past that you’d like to share with us?
Hazel: I used to do voice-overs in Singapore. I often got things in one-take, but once, a Chinese woman from an ad agency decided that I hadn’t worked enough to earn my money. So she questioned the authenticity of my accent. What accent was I “faking”? An Irish one, which happens to be authentic!!! I also used to teach. My first day in a Singaporean classroom, I had a child in my class whose personal name (God love him!) was Kun Ting. I kid you not. I always called him “Darling”
Kristi: Any life experiences you’d like to share?
Hazel: Nothing I ever do will be nearly as important as mothering. Though, I often muse that more Multi-National Corporations should have divorced mothers on their boards. We are adept at mediation and conflict resolution; fantastic at running a department (home) on a nearly non-existent budget and are wonderful multi-taskers. We think on our feet, fire-fight without blinking and have impeccably finely honed organisational skills.
Kristi: I couldn’t agree more! Thanks so much for sharing your fascinating life with us at How Did You Get There, and as always, Thank you for playing!